Washington Whingers: Why Did Elon Musk Do This to Us?

AP Photo/Alex Brandon

I do not believe I have ever seen such a bunch of whiny, whingy adults in one place in my lifetime.

The Capitol Hill Swamp Thangs who figured they could shove through this 1500-page Democratic Christmas pork present - as if the message of November 6th never, EH-VAH happened and wasn't resoundingly clear to everyone but them - had to be smoking some of that new supercharged dope I wrote about the other day.

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Once the Continuing Resolution exploded over Democrats' and Speaker Mike Johnson's heads, those waggly fingers of blame started being pointed, and never at the perpetrators.

Oh, no, no, no.

It's always someone else's fault when Washington trips over its obtuse arrogance.

This ridiculous, unnecessary, embarrassing af CR exercise reminds me of the 3-frame meme where the guy is riding a bike, then leans over the handlebars to shove a stick through his front spokes. 

In the last frame, he's on the ground, holding his knee and moaning some version of, "Why did Donald Trump do this to me?"

It's the saddest, most pathetic thing. To watch grown men and women get caught in broad daylight with their hands in the cookie jar yet again. 

Hello

They had all the warnings in the world - and 77,275,579 personal affirmations - that business as usual wasn't going to fly, that those days were done.

Yet they still slapped 1500 pages down on the table with the "best we could offer" line of fabled yore.

Speaker Johnson is so well-versed in the Old Ways that his public excuses for the CR as it stood and was confidently presented to the House at large were made with the presumption of a 'Done Deal.' Based entirely on What Had Come Many Times Before.

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Besides, there were too many pages to read and too little time - ignoring that promise for 'timely' legislative submissions - plus the added emotional pressure of 'and it's CHRISTMAS.' Wellthe hierarchy knew they had this sucker in the bag just like every time before.

Obviously, there's been nothing learned and zero clues taken from this election cycle about the dissemination of information and the blazing rate of speed in a viral news cycle. Not Meet the Press or the evening broadcast. Social media when it's used purposefully in the pursuit of timely information and action.

And, man - did the news (with screenshots for evidence) of this flaming pile of dogcrap ever spread like wildfire across social media, mainly the now unencumbered-by-progressive-censors 'X.' The owner of X, Elon Musk, took to the platform, amplifying what everyone discussing the CR was feeling about both the legislation and the Republican members of Congress who have had the unmitigated temerity to offer it up in the first place.

The backlash was fast, furious, immediate, and stunned the crap out of unprepared for resistance of any magnitude Congresscreatures.

They were beyond flummoxed and probably the most uncomfortable they have ever been in their political lives.

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CALL A WAAHMBULANCE

Naturally, the fault couldn't be with any actions they'd taken - it had to be with the reactions, and they needed to quickly finger someone to take the heat off.

The bogeyman for this misadventure in legislation and governance has been chosen by the stick-holding bike riders in Congress and their media toadies, and the winner is?

WHY DID ELON MUSK DO THIS TO US?

The shameless Congressional choral version of "Marsha, Marsha, Marsha" started post-haste.

Yup. That's what they're going to do.

BUT BILLIONAIRE!

The Washington Post's morning email made a point to throw in 'chaos' in connection with Elon twice for good measure, as if he was a Marvel supervillain controlling everything from a mountaintop fortress in the Himalayas.

Elon BROUGHT chaos. Elon CAUSED chaos.

Well, my gosh! What a terrible guy! Have we turned running the government over to a maniacal, ee-ville billionaire?

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 'T'would seem so if one is sucker enough to fall for the narrative they are desperately trying to build at the moment to cover this disgraceful betrayal of the confidence the American voters showed by handing Congress - actually all three branches of government - back to Republicans.

It's not going to work, guys.

See, we all know what's going on every single minute, and I know it's killing you that we do.

So when you and your cohorts in pork and pilfering pull shameless stunts like this - blaming a private citizen (who allowed unfettered access to information) for callously freezing hurricane victims in North Carolina - you only harden our resolve to force you to finally do what voters voted for...

...and to crush any future machinations - along with your most precious political hopes and dreams - like the bugs you are.

The Democratic bugs who are, in fact, responsible for *checks notes* destitute, abandoned, and freezing hurricane victims in North Carolina.

Yeah - we're keeping track practically by the minute.

Information is power, and you all are in so much trouble.

This is where the confusion of an entrenched, sclerotic elite confronted by a resistance now armed with real-time information and power clashes.

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'Surely one man is directing it all?' they whimper, whinge, and wail. 'These knuckle-dragging peasants couldn't possibly have come up with this on their own.'

Hard lessons in accountability are coming, Congress.

Elon simply unlocked the gate.

You'd be smart to drop the stick before you do any more damage.

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