Okay, my darlings - DAMN. That's all I can say. I've been in that overwhelmed comment section trying to catch up with you all while listening to major dad on the couch (who was supposed to be asleep) HOWLING at CNN positively MELTING DOWN over Biden's horrible, terrible, really suck-ass debate performance tonight. He keeps asking me - Dr Alice has left to go home, bemused and giggling as she did so - "Was it really THAT BAD?"

And then they'll play another clip and his jaw hit the floor.

Yeah - it was THAT BAD.

So what happens from here? I don't know. Once these weak sisters get done crapping their drawers tonight and get back to sharpening their knives tomorrow, Jill Biden better start planning on buying new party frocks at Marshall's, because I think her FLOTUS days are coming to an abrupt end.

Couldn't happen to a nicer pair.

As for our 45th president.

All I can say is "He did it." And ever so well. I had hoped the Trump we've seen on the campaign trail was the Trump we would see tonight and that he would have the strength to overcome his baser instincts to strike and brutalize and damn if he didn't eviscerate the hoarse hootin' quivering mass of gelatin to his left with lethal and socially acceptable precision. It was a masterclass in lethal restraint from the last person on earth you'd expect but the one person who needed it most.

And he delivered.

I cannot thank you all enough again for joining me and my sad little fingers in this most memorable and remarkable of nights. May we NEVER see another like it or be cursed with so miserable a chief executive. But that we were here together to watch the devil himself rise out of his angry, fiery orange haze to comfortably settle the mantle of president around his shoulders? Whoda thunk?

I love it.

You guys ROCK and are the best company anyone could ask for.

Now go to bed, dammit.

*************************************

CNN is saying the Dem strategists are saying "OMGOD OM GOD OM GOD" I Am DYING

And Trump did this ALL ON BIDEN'S TERMS. BITCHES

1040 And Jill is escorting a lonely POTATUS off the stage by his loneself. Trump is long fawking gone.

And CNN analysts are already melting down about how "terrible" the debate was.

1037 Trump makes our country unsafe we look like fools. Iran was broke, they had no money again Ukraine should have never happened. For 3 1/2 years they don't respect you here and around the world. Wraps up really well.

I can't belive this is how the Biden campaign thought their

1035 This last 2 mins is not going well from the get go. TAx system? THIS GUY Oh, this is a farkin disater for a final statement. Dear God. He's lost. BRAIN MELT

1031 Mushmouth argle bargle in answer to Trumps incredibly measured and well constructed answer to Bash's repeated probes while ignoring Biden. I have to admit Trump has been masterful and so unTrumpish. Like - dare I say it? A president.

Girlfriend keeps pushing teh "would you accept the results" and Trump throws it back at her in the most reasonable fashion ever.

Trump very deferential - "If I might" - but goes into a screed on Putin rolling over Biden.

Biden is so, SO weak. Alice says the upper half of Biden's face isn't moving. And he has to repeat phrases. 

And Trumps answer on to the gotcha Jan 6would you accept question is so well done. I wish he was a great president because I would be here right not=w. I wouldn't be indicted because I woudlnt' be his opponent. We are a failing nation and being driven into WWIII, no one fears him.

1025 Seriously now a pissing contest as Alice say and TRump says LET'S NOT ACT LIKE CHILDREN

1023 Trump dings him on cognitive tests. He's hilarious. 

KEPP TALKING BUDDY A SINGLE MAJOR COUNTRY PRESIDENT Keep saving him CNN you're doing great

Biden - you'll be 86 - 1st of all I'm the youngest and now I'm the oldest. He incompetent. ARGLE BARGLE MILLIONS AND BILLIONS BY THE WAY

JUST SHOOT ME

WE INVENTED THOSE CHIPS

1020 He ended remain in Mex we pay $^M for a hostage. Putin is laughing at this guy probably asking for billions for this guy. T

Biden - big machines that stop drugs coming across the borden? WTF? WE NEED THOSE MACHINES

COVID drugs pouring across the border, dogs, low numbers, then BIden came along and the amount of traficking including humans, amount largest ever.

1015 H=Biden says he will icrease taxes on middle class I would never do that and kafehkefheh. The middle class was devastated by Trump. You've never made any progress with china.

1015 Oh stop with the ego here Trump but again he saves it by going to saving the Trump tax cuts. When we cut we did more business.

1013 NO ONe thinks we're weak. Argle bargle another list of people who said TRUMP'S THE WORST. And childcare!

And CNN saves him again

1011 Trump General again - Biden has never fired any one. It's no easy to fire people you pay a price for it. should have fired everyone associated with Afghanistan. Anyone for the worst border situation in the world - have you fired anyone. A swe sit up here and waste a lot of time. He's destroyed our country

9109 Every time you think Trump might be going off the rails, he ties it into a salient point that just skewers Biden.

And By the way, I'VE RAISED THE MONEY FOR pELL GRANTS...WHICH IS ALWAYS APPLICABLE TO SOCIAL SECURITY RECIPIENTS

So you still have 82 seconds left you got any other brilliant ideas? tapper to the social security question rescue now JFC

1006 Great climate corps Another boondoggle. Sure glad I hadn't agreed to drink on "oh by the way"

1004 If anyone wants to explain to me why Biden said black colleges have anything to do with black colleges, please - I just refilled my existential glass of wine. HAVE AT IT

I want clean water and clean air and we had the best numbers ever and I had the best numbers ever. So FAWK NO I AIN'T DOING SQUAT  Okay he didn't say that

Rising sea levels -Trump goes back to police groups supporting him and 

1000 I wasn't kidding about CNN saving Biden ass. They let mushmouth filibuster here

The millions of people of he's allowed to to take black jobs AND THANK YOU. PRESIDENT BIDEN?

"THOUSANDS OF MILLIONS"

958 Trump he caused the inflation and it's killing blacks families and everyone. I gave him a country with essentially no inflation Green new scam as sure as you're sitting there

You have 49 seconds left - DERP USE YOUR TIME CNN TRYING TO HELP YOU

957 Question about black voters and now POTATUSis going to tell them they have no idea what's going on in their life

THANK GOD A BREAK!

Okay kudos to Trump for maintaining his cool with all this. I think he realizes that Biden is going down in flames all on his own

950 FINE PEOPLE lie and DRINK

I think the feds are on to me.

Okay guys having innerwebs connection problems so might be a lag

His son is a convicted felon. Trump actually laid out a really cogent case 

935 Bdein what are you doing with ISrael - claims everyone endorsed his Gaza plan. Hamas wants plan to continue. Pushing hard to get them to accept. I haven't allowed 2K lb bombs. By the way I'm the one who organized the world against Iran argle bargle we saved Israel. two different things. We send every body there like we did to get BIN LADNE 9WHAT)

934 Biden If you want a war and the seques to why we're strong because what we give Ukraine is weapons not money. I can't keep up.

Every time Zelensky comes here he leaves with another $60M 

CNN just saved him again. What horseschlitz. And good jib Trump sounding so reasonable

9:31 MALARKEY and drink

POTATUS We've done more than veterans than any administration in history.

51 intelligence agents and 16 economists. He made up the suckers and losers.

Suckers and losers and Trump calls him out on it. "I'm so glad this came up" to think that I would say that"

9:26 Biden Every single thing he said is a lie. Here WE GO WITH BEAU. We love veterans. 

Our vetrans are on the street./ I can't believe CNN is allowing Trump to filobuster like this. They must know...holy crap

9:24 Trump correcting him - Al Bagdadi and Soleimani - he's the one killing people with who he's let across. We don't have borders anymore. People are coming across and killing our citizens. These 3 incredible girls over the past few days. We are literally an uncivilized country right now

8:23 Al Qaeda came across and killed 3 American soldiers? The only terrorists?

Finally a zinger - "I don't think he knows what he said either " I can't begrudge him that" THis guy just left the border open We had the safest border in history"

918 Trump is utterly and completely in control of this

Biden says it's a terrible thing Trumps done. Idea states can do it is likeHOLY SCHLITZ did he just confuse Layken Reilly with ABORTION?!

Dana Basch to the rescue

Trump pointing out the radical faction of the left

9:14 Reasonable voice on Trump pointing out the history of Roe about turning it back to the states. Keeping it to that. "Now the states are working it out they're all making their own decisions" Invoking Reagan" Really sharp here. Believes in the exceptions. Alice with me on this

What a farking disaster already. The right side of the screen is devastating

9:12 We have a thousand trillionaires. Oh Biden. He is stumbling. He looks and sounds awful. He can't begin to counter Trump's and now stumbling.

GOD A:LMIGHTY

WE FINALLY BEAT MEDICARE?!?!?!

The damage he's done to this country why he's allowed people to destroy this country AWESOME

909 Good explanation of the tax cuts. Rock on

Lord POTATUS looks BAD

908 Trump responded to Biden argle bargle and maintaining so well.

Holy crap whatever they gave him they should have used the time release. WTF

Trump left me a mess. Economy left me a mess. He's talking so fast coughing, pandemic. AND SCRANTON KITCHEN TABLE DRINK

9:02 Economy Prices are hi POTATUS what choo doing about it? Houses are expensive:

Oh this is not a good look for Gampie

This is excruciating already. ALICE WHERE"S THE BOTTLE?!?!

7:55 OMG you guys

. Just switched to CNN and they are losing their cookies over Trump already. There is not enough wine in the world for this.

******************************************

I canNOT believe we have made it to this day...actually, that POTATUS is still on the fight card and hasn't chickened out. Knock me over with a feather boa.

But here we are.

I don't believe I have any expectations for this evening as the possibilities for catastrophe are so ghastly and so real and could take so many forms - it would take me an hour to list them. 

To my way of thinking, the most important would be Trump's demeanor. Does he maintain this good-natured, presidential, unflappable face he's had through all these trials and travails imposed on him by the very villain he'll be facing? Or does he lose his orange cookies at something Biden says that just hits the wrong way? I am hopeful Trump plays this like a fiddle. That's all he has to do. He has the record to refute every single thing they're projecting he would do in a second term as if a Trump first term had never existed. What could be easier? 

Being affable and not an a**hole will be the key.

Trump has to remember that there are other needles in that room besides the one they pump into POTATUS's asterisk right before he comes onstage and not to fall for it. Everyone knows Biden's a nasty piece - it's second nature for him - and his handlers will want to have him snarling and baiting Trump while he's still fresh off his meds.

At this rate, the debate should be a week long. Trump could hack it. POTATUS is taking a week off to prep for 90 minutes.

— tree hugging s*ster 🎃 (@WelbornBeege) June 26, 2024

As for the dementia-riddled geriatric sack of carbon who'll no doubt be clinging to the other podium after standing in his special shoes for an hour and a half- oy. This could go off the rails in a million different ways, all of them excruciating and cringe-inducing because God help us and forgive 81M of them - he IS the 46th president of this country. Which leaves us wondering not what brilliant foreign policy points he argues, or touts which supposed economic success, but whether he comes out screaming and waving his fists at the audience in his head. 

Can Biden form complete sentences and give voice to cogent thought as answers? Or does he mumble-jumbo and collapse into mushed-mouth incoherence?

Will POTATUS even have a visible pulse, or does he slip into zzzzzzzzz, deflating like a witch in the corner after being doused with a bucket of water? 

Man, this is grim.

And what role do the CNN anchors play...because they always have. It's a time-honored tradition over there, saving flailing Democrats.

Speaking of which, here they go...

So far today I’ve seen:

- CNN implement a longer broadcast delay
- Biden refuse a drug test
- Media banished from the room in case of a ‘presidential medical emergency’
- No audience

This is not a debate. It is a farce. https://t.co/rgM5g7OXeA

— James Spiro (@JamesSpiro) June 27, 2024

This could be something else. 

Now, four months out, it's hardly make or break for Trump, whatever the prognosticators and doom-sayers are moaning about in the background.

But for Biden? If he can't pull this off, as low as the expectations are, Lizzo will be warming up in the wings and Hillary Clinton's chipmunk cheeks will glow with an evil fire.

As The Spectator put it today...

...Biden has got the debate he wanted. It’s up to him to deliver.

Alrighty, you guys - at a couple of minutes to 9 pm EST, I will kick this pig and make sure it is refreshing and scrolling.

Lemme repeat my long-standing rules of engagement.

*I will also have a full glass of cabernet, with the bottle standing by* 

The rules are simple:

1) Be nice to each other

2) Don't you dare say a word about any spelling or grammatical errors as I'll be typing like a fiend, not to mention trying to visit with you guys in the comments

3) See Rule #2

DON'T MAKE ME COME DOWN IN THE COMMENTS TO GET YOU, Y'HEAR?!

SPEAKING of the comments, if you're not a HotAir VIP member, holy crap! 

NOW WOULD BE THE TIME! We've got a terrific 48-hr 60% off VIP membership special going that gives you access to the comments  - which is especially cool for major, breaking events like the debate - plus ad-free browsing, Ed's awesome videos, special features just for VIP members, other goodies, and you help keep our voices on the web telling you what they are working so hard for you not to be able to hear. Your support is incredibly important to helping us keep the free expression of conservative beliefs, information, and the truth available to everyone.

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Tonight should be fun.