On the road: Biden classified documents scattered from CHINAtown to Delaware

AP Photo/Evan Vucci

Let’s just say it – it’s been good to be a Biden. Damn near better than being a Clinton, because Bill and HIll had people hounding them about this and that almost from the beginning. If she’d been a bit more likable, like Regular Joe, maybe that wouldn’t have happened. Then the Arkansas duo, who have a ton more intellectually on the ball than the devious dope from Delaware, might have been able to cruise through public life larding their pockets unimpeded. Alas. They’ve neither Biden’s natural charm nor feral instincts.

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The days of wine, roses and immunity could be coming to an end for the Bidens as well, having overstepped the boundaries of rapaciousness, sloth, and the wielding of raw political power in an age of information access. Whatever miracles their Praetorian Guard have been able to work shielding them from the consequences of being Bidens – and all that encompasses – are also being exposed by forces they try, but can’t completely control. The public may be a tad late getting up to speed on what’s truly going on, but they do find out. And are astute enough to make comparisons between individuals and situations that neither are complimentary to nor bode well for POTATUS.

Take the Trump classified document email SCANDAL. Please. A very public raid, intimations of [insert: Joe ScrewYourBorough voiceover] THREATS TO NATIONAL SECURITY AND UNGUARDED NUCLEAR CODES so dire it necessitated rooting through Melania’s underwear drawer. The ludicrous statements from the White House professing ignorance of events, expressing horror at the apparent disregard for the sacred protocols of the National Archives and lax document security.

Authorities produced, literally, a picture of document covers stamped Secret, Top Secret, etc, scattered about the plush carpeting to emphasize the carelessness of the previous president and how the FBI saved us from a worse disaster just in the nick of time. What if Chairman Xi had to use the men’s room at Mar A Lago, and opened the door to the room with the folders on the floor by mistake? See?

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Damn bad, BAD Orange Man.

Sic ’em, Garland!

Well, monkey’s uncle. Then Republicans took the House by the hair of their chinny chin chins, and that has stymied the march to wipe all opposition from the board a smidge.

Awkwardly, a few dribs and drabs of information about a similar situation with Biden himself came to light. Turns out there were boxes of classified documents in his office at the Penn-Biden Center in D.C. – of course, “in a locked closet” – and, weirdly enough, in the garage with his little green Corvette. No worries, though – as I wrote here in January, the garage was always locked, you dummies, because CORVETTE!!!

Never you mind about the documents they keep finding other places, which, as these were taken while Biden was both senator and vice-president ergo he had zero right to them, to begin with, this is nowhere as bad and NOTHING LIKE what the Orange Man did and what we’re going to try to nail him to the wall for.

Or, at the very least, bleed Trump dry paying for his defense.

Except…that genie’s out of the Biden bottle and, whoa, boy. Thanks to the dogged, thorough work of Reps. James Comer and Jim Jordan, POTATUS has got some ‘splainin’ to do.

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“The documents were moved from the vice-presidency to at least three different locations in a personal vehicle. And why they were in three different locations we don’t know. They weren’t stored behind any lock. One of the locations was in Chinatown.

Wait, whut – CHINAtown? Who keeps ANYTHING in CHINAtown?

You know, besides someone completely owned by who does regular business with the Chinese.

Comer’s information came directly from the source. He and his committee had just deposed Kathy Chung, who is an unimpeachable witness as far as the documents go.

House Committee on Oversight and Accountability Chairman James Comer (R-Ky.) issued the following statement on today’s transcribed interview with Kathy Chung, who served as assistant to Joe Biden when he was Vice President:

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Ms. Chung also threw another log on the fire as far as the timeline for all this went.

…“We also learned today that then-White House Counsel Dana Remus tasked Kathy Chung with retrieving these boxes from the Penn Biden Center as early as May 2022. This story does not begin in November 2022, as represented by President Biden’s attorney.

Get outta here. Is POTATUS lying again?

…The Biden White House had said previously that a lawyer clearing out Biden’s old office at the Penn Biden Center in Washington had discovered materials marked classified inside a closet in November 2022. Chung’s testimony indicated that Biden had stored classified materials at multiple locations in Washington, D.C., and that his team had been aware of them for months prior to the November “discovery.”

I thought lying was bad.

The Praetorian Guard is spooled up, trying to manufacture “differences” in circumstances for willing dupes to swallow.

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Sadly for them, that Corvette has driven into the sunset.

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