Will Europeans fall for the EU's "flatten the curve in-the-energy-tailpipe" trick?

(AP Photo/Jean-Francois Badias)

Just a warning before you watch this disturbing video:

TAKE NOTE: This is who Elsa in Frozen would have grown up to be had they not snapped her out of her murderous, ice castle killing spree.

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Keep an eye on that Thunberg kid.

Okay. I’m done.

On to EU Commission President Ursula von der Leyen here, with a preview of “Coming Attractions: Bartertown”:

If you listen to her (and I have to listen, I can’t watch the gestures. They give me heebeejeebees), you’ll hear “we’ll work very closely with the member states…”, which loosely translates into “use the power of our economic purse to beat them into submission.”

I sent this to our son, Ebola (don’t ask) (Okay. If enough people ask, I’ll explain.), in Germany to see what impact he thought this would have should it come to pass. He sent back:

Still not within the confines of their pseudo-federal powers. They’re an economic block, not a true federal block. French will probably tell them to pound sand.

Germans may, too, given the response I’ve seen here purely to the German gov’t.

She starts with “We’ve weakened the grip that Russia had on our economy and continent” and then goes into a five-point plan, the gist of which is this, with my cynical American take added:

1) Smart Savings of Electricity – Ha-LOOOOOO electricity rationing. As one Twitter wit put it, “Got candles ready to flatten the curve?”

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2) Cap on revenues of companies producing electricity with low costs – Solar, wind, biomass. NOW they’re “making too much profit,” so the EU is going to cap those Euros, and Germany just added a windfall tax (HotAir). This should work out well.

3) Solidarity contribution for fossil fuel companies – Okay, this seems to be an equity play. Oil, et al, needs to have some skin in the game, so they’ll have to pony up…something.

4) Liquidity Support for energy utility companies – They’re gonna pump money into these natural gas companies (many now partially state owned, like Germany’s Uniper, thanks to previous bailouts), so the sector doesn’t do the Lehman-like collapse it’s tottering on the edge of.

5) Cap on Russian gas – Which should be pretty easy to enforce, since…they’re NOT GETTING ANY ANYTIME SOON.

Expanded here:

A month ago, Hamburg was making plans to ration HOT WATER (YahooNews)…

Hamburg’s environment senator said the city could set limits on when people can use hot water.

Jens Kerstan told Welt am Sonntag that this could happened in the case of an “acute gas shortage.”

Germany is scrambling to plug the gap in energy supplies after cutting its dependence on Russian gas.

Hamburg, the largest non-capital city in the European Union, has warned that it could ration be forced to hot water as the Russian energy crisis causes chaos.

Jens Kerstan, environment senator for Germany’s second biggest city, told German newspaper Welt am Sonntag on Saturday that Hamburg could restrict availability of hot water to certain times of days “in an acute gas shortage.”

“We are in a much worse crisis than most people realize,” Kerstan said in a separate interview with the Hamburger Abendblatt on Sunday. He urged people to take shorter showers, avoid full baths, and install modern thermostats and water-saving shower heads.

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…and now the EU is talking about dark at dinner?

Oh, the natives could truly get restless.

Little did Audi realize their 2010 Super Bowl commercial was a “Fascist Green Dummies Guide To Ruin Everyone’s Life” for EU elites…

…as opposed to the “That would NEVER HAPPEN IN A MILLION YEARS!” gutbuster fantasy we thought it was.

Nobody’s laughing.

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