New loathsome nanny-state initiative: Banning bottomless brunches

Welcome to DeBlasio’s New York. Pretty much the same as Bloomberg’s New York, though hitting people in the Mimosas may be even more painful than the Coke and donuts. For those unacquainted with the brunching habits of the urban East Coaster, those in their late 20s and early 30s—young enough that they’re still partying late enough to need to sleep in but old enough to drop a bit on a decent breakfast—gather in large groups at charming neighborhood establishments for breakfast classics and ever-more-intricate ways to serve bacon accompanied by America’s two approved breakfast cocktails: Bloody Marys and Mimosas. The competition is stiff, both for patrons and restaurants. Customers happily take on long lines, crowded quarters, and awkward table arrangements thanks to the social lubrication afforded by brunch’s most popular deal— the bottomless Bloody or Mimosa. (Yes, this happens plenty of other places, too, but Ed Morrissey requested a definition on TEMS today, so I’m supplying one to all readers.)

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As an aside, I’ve long waged war on the term “brunch,” preferring that people stop dressing up their weekend endeavors and acknowledge what they really are. In my world, it’s called Hangover Breakfast. Just because I’m dropping three times as much on it doesn’t mean it’s more dignified than a bacon, egg, & cheese biscuit at Bo’s the day after a college party.

But whatever you call it, this particular special is about to bite the dust in New York City. So cosmopolitan. Chase your dreams! Follow your heart song! Do what feels right, man! Unless what feels right is more than 1.5 Blood Orange Mimosas on a Sunday.

Guys, this might be your final weekend for happiness. No really, I’m serious. The NYC Hospitality Alliance is cracking down. On what, you ask? Kitchen cleanliness? No. Rats? Nope. Bottomless brunches? YES. That’s right, those unlimited deals — on mimosas and Bloody Marys (and whiskey drinks at the swanky joints) — that make Sundays in New York so fun are actually against the law. What’s that? Oh, just the sound of your weekend buzz dying.

Recently there has been press about restaurants around New York City that offer bottomless brunches or unlimited drink offers. In most cases, these type of promotions are UNLAWFUL according to the NYS Liquor Authority (SLA).

HATERS.

Essentially, according to the Alliance, restauranteurs are prohibited from “selling, serving, delivering or offering to patrons an unlimited number of drinks during any set period of time for a fixed price.”

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Some may dismiss this kind of thing as silly. It’s certainly a first-world problem. But the uproar on social media about this, from mostly urban liberals, is proof of the truism that the way to people’s hearts is through their stomachs. So, when we’re looking to win hearts and minds, serve more Mimosas.

If you’ve ever wondered how ridiculous liquor laws can get, check out this video made by my friend Caleb Brown a couple years ago, about Virginia’s legal morass:

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