As long as we’re shark-jumping, President Obama, let’s pole vault these suckers, shall we?

The White House’s transparently petty decision to inflict sequester’s pain on America’s middle-schoolers (as if those years aren’t tough enough) revealed its sequestration doomsaying as silly and its post-doomsaying behavior as spiteful. In a rare good PR turn for Republicans, what was meant to make them look like heartless meanies has held the White House up for ridicule for its utter unwillingness to prioritize. Upon hearing the estimates that the White House’s cancellation of tours might save the administration $18,000-$72,000 a week, Fox News anchor Eric Bolling— I’m sure they’re fans at the White House— decided to come to the aid of The Children.

In a Facebook post on Thursday, anchor Eric Bolling announced that he will offer to personally pay the costs to keep the tours at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue open for a week.

During Thursday evening’s episode of “The Five,” Bolling elaborated. “I will absolutely write the check if they open the doors next week.”

“I’ll make you a deal Mr. President…Let these families take their White House tours next week and I’ll cover the added expenses. Word is it will cost around $74,000.”

Referencing White House press secretary Jay Carney, the Fox host added: “Mr Carney, you know this an offer you can’t refuse. Give me a call.”

Grab your popcorn, everyone, and the kids of St. Paul’s Lutheran School, grab your bags:

https://twitter.com/seanhannity/status/309797415341408256

Meanwhile, the sequester saga is ongoing, as Carney assures us today that while White House tours are out, the White House Easter Egg Roll is safe:

“I would refer both to the East Wing and the Secret Service, but it’s my understanding that as of now, the decision has been made that the Easter Egg Roll will go forward,” Carney said.

On Tuesday, the Obama administration announced it was canceling tours of the White House indefinitely due to “staffing reductions resulting from sequestration.”

Asked why the Easter Egg Roll would continue when tours had been canceled, Carney characterized the decision as similar to “choices you make all the time” about budget issues.

“This is about trade-offs. Because when you have the kind of severe cuts that the sequester represents, you have to reduce your budget accordingly. And then you have to make choices about what you do and what you don’t,” Carney said.

Earlier in his briefing with reporters, Carney defended the decision to cancel the tours, saying it was emblematic of the tough decisions forced by the sequester.

Yes, it is about trade-offs. The Easter Egg Roll is a one-time event, so is no doubt cheaper than weekly tours. It’s also a small event, with a lottery system for commoners, and a bunch of appearances by the progeny of government staffers, political appointees, lobbyists, and visiting Hollywood stars. I’m sure the Reese Witherspoon photo-ops (and she did look fab!) have nothing to do with its being spared while the tours for the hoi polloi are jettisoned.